Is My New Neighbor Rude, Racist, or Just Nosey?
I had an intriguing encounter with my new neighbor this morning, and I’m not sure what to make of it. A bit of background: I’m a 35-year-old guy who recently bought a flat in London for £500k. It’s a small block with just four flats, and for now, I’m splitting my time between my family home and my new place while I wait for furniture and broadband to be set up.
When I first moved in, I introduced myself to all the neighbors except for one—who I learned was away at the time. My interactions with the other neighbors have been brief but friendly: a simple “Hi, I’m [Name]. Just moved in, thought I’d say hello.”
Everything was going smoothly until this morning. As I was closing my door to take out the rubbish, the neighbor who had been away stepped out of her flat. She glanced at me and I said, “Hi…” before she abruptly asked, “Are you the new cleaner?”
I was taken aback. “No, I just moved in,” I replied. She looked shocked and then asked, “Renting?” while sizing me up.
“No, I bought it,” I responded, thinking it was odd that she hadn’t noticed the “Sold” sign outside. Who does she think she is?
Then, she inquired about my job. At this point, her questions felt invasive, and I decided not to answer. I thought to myself, “That’s none of your business.”
I walked past her to dispose of the rubbish, and when I returned to my flat, she was waiting by my door. She said, “Please keep the noise down. This is a quiet block.”
I just went inside without responding. What’s going on with her?
It sounds like you had a pretty uncomfortable interaction with your new neighbor, and it’s understandable to be annoyed by her comments. From what you’ve described, her behavior could come across as rude or invasive. Asking if you’re the “new cleaner” right off the bat certainly has undertones that might feel dismissive or prejudiced, especially given the context of your new flat purchase.
Her next question about whether you were renting could also imply a certain judgment, making it seem like she’s trying to assess your status in a way that feels inappropriate. The way she looked you up and down adds to the notion that she’s sizing you up, which can feel very intrusive.
When she approached you about keeping the noise down, it could have come off as overbearing, especially since you mentioned that you’re mostly keeping to yourself and not causing any disturbance. It seems like she’s set a tone of being judgmental before even getting to know you.
Overall, her questions and comments do raise concerns about being both nosey and potentially prejudiced. You don’t have to engage further if her inquiries continue to make you uncomfortable, and it might be best to keep your interactions minimal and polite moving forward. Hopefully, things will settle down as you continue to acclimate to your new home!