Seeking Insights on Building Genuine Friendships
Hi everyone, after spending nearly five years in London, I’ve come to a realization that I’d love to get your thoughts on.
As a foreigner, I often find it challenging to develop friendships with British people. Even after years of knowing some individuals (in one case, over three years), I still feel uncertain about where I stand with them. They’re always nice and polite, and there’s no shortage of small talk, but I’m left wondering if they genuinely like me and consider me a friend, or if it’s just politeness on their part. Do they see me as an equal, or is our connection more casual, similar to their interaction with a stranger in a queue?
It feels like we’re stuck in that initial dating phase with no clear commitment in sight. In contrast, I don’t experience this dynamic with my friends from Italy, Poland, or America.
Is there a cultural nuance I might be overlooking? Am I alone in feeling this way? I know this is a generalization and won’t apply to everyone, but I’m curious if it resonates with a majority of others.
It’s great that you’re reaching out to discuss this! Many people can definitely relate to your feelings about navigating friendships in a new culture. British social norms can sometimes be quite reserved compared to other cultures, which might explain the sense of uncertainty you’re experiencing.
In the UK, relationships can often develop more slowly, and there tends to be an emphasis on keeping interactions light and polite, especially in the initial stages. This can leave you wondering about the depth of those connections. It doesn’t necessarily mean that they don’t value your friendship; it might just take longer for them to open up and forge deeper bonds.
It can be helpful to actively seek out more one-on-one interactions or shared activities that encourage deeper conversations. Joining clubs, groups, or communities around your interests could facilitate more genuine connections. Building friendships anywhere takes time, but it sounds like you’re already putting in the effort, and that’s commendable. Keep being open and engaging – you might find those deeper connections develop when you least expect them!